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I Have Failed.

Updated: Jul 2

Carrying you with so much difficulty is never a burden.

Building up my dream job for years has always been challenging, and it pains me that I have failed everyone who was counting on me.

I felt this would happen, but I felt powerless to prevent it. Despite spending hours researching online, I couldn't find a way to avoid the inevitable. It all began earlier this year when there was a surge in the use of AI and significant changes in the global economy, resulting in a decline in our client base. I tried my best to persevere, but I eventually found myself in a situation where I needed help. It was a tough and challenging time; I hit rock bottom and didn't know where to turn. To add to the difficulty, I also lost my day job and my master's degree scholarship in December 2022. Even though I initially thought I could sustain myself through my studio work, I realized I needed additional support.

Dealing with an overwhelming amount of bills and debt while trying to take care of my family has been incredibly difficult. It's a constant source of stress, and I often lie awake at night, unable to sleep as my mind races with thoughts of how to find solutions. I'm incredibly grateful to have my wife by my side during this challenging time; her support means everything to me, and I don't know how I would manage without her.

As a responsible adult and a father, I am pressured to find a way out of this challenging situation. There are moments when I play with my daughter, trying to be present and engaged, but in reality, my thoughts are elsewhere, fixated on finding solutions to our financial predicament. It's a heavy burden to carry, and there have been times when I've had to put on a brave face and force a smile, even though inside, I'm feeling completely hopeless. It's a painful experience, but I'm doing everything I can to navigate through it for the sake of my family.

Earlier today, a friend and an avid fan of my webcomic 'Zamora' contacted me at a particularly opportune moment. During our conversation, he opened up about the challenges he's been facing, which resonated with me as I, too, have been struggling with similar issues. It reminded me that, as human beings, we are all interconnected and reliant on each other for support and survival.

Is AI destroying human creativity? Stock photo by Markus Winkler at Pexels
Is AI destroying human creativity? Stock photo by Markus Winkler at Pexels

It is what it is.

The creative industry is experiencing significant challenges, with widespread layoffs and a growing trend of large companies replacing human artists with AI technologies. Even smaller businesses, which used to be my primary clients, are increasingly turning to AI for their creative needs. It's becoming clear that the industry's future is deeply intertwined with AI. While artists have advocated for the legal and ethical use of these technologies, the pervasive adoption of AI is making it increasingly difficult to resist its impact.

As creatives, we face a daunting future. We are compelled to acquire new skills to secure jobs and earn a living. This presents a difficult choice, as we have no other options but to adapt or risk becoming irrelevant. It's disheartening to witness the creative industry in such a state. Looking ahead, we may ponder the significance of human creativity and lament if we've allowed it to slip away.

As I write these words, I want to convey that my studio will continue operating with a skeletal workforce. The decision to operate with minimal staff is personally agonizing and deeply distressing. However, it's a necessary step to keep the business afloat during these challenging times.

The tenacity of the human spirit is truly evident as we, as creative individuals, grapple with limited resources and relentlessly strive to endure in this unforgiving and demanding contemporary landscape. This trying phase will eventually be overcome, but the impact it has etched on our lives is profound and transformative.

Stay strong.

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