Building Habits That Stick
- JP de la Rama
- 2 days ago
- 3 min read
How I Stopped Fighting Myself and Started Designing My Life
“You don’t rise by becoming someone new. You rise by building systems that support who you already are.”
Setting the Stage
Let’s continue from a few weeks’ entry about Atomic Habits.
We talked about something deceptively simple but painfully hard:
changing your habits by changing your identity.
Not “I want to be productive.”
But “I am the type of person who shows up.”
For years, I tried to transform myself into the mythical “productive machine” that YouTube gurus love to flaunt.
5 AM wake-ups.
Cold showers.
Color-coded schedules.
Motivational playlists.
And for a few days? I looked unstoppable.
Then reality hit.
I’d slowly slide back into old patterns—doom scrolling, procrastinating, bargaining with myself:
“I’ll start tomorrow.”
“I deserve a break.”
“Just one more video.”
Rinse. Repeat. Guilt.
A month into actually studying Atomic Habits by James Clear, something finally clicked:
I wasn’t broken.
I wasn’t lazy.
I wasn’t weak.
I simply never understood how habits actually work.
Why Willpower Always Fails
Most artists I know blame themselves when they can’t stay consistent.
“I have no discipline.”
“I lack motivation.”
“I’m just not built for routines.”
That’s a lie we’ve been taught to believe.
James Clear breaks habits into a simple loop:
Cue → Craving → Response → Reward
Every habit you have—good or bad—follows this loop.
Not knowing this is like trying to animate without understanding keyframes.
You can still draw.
But you’ll struggle.
Let me break this down in human terms.
Cue – The Trigger A cue is what starts the behavior. Phone vibrates. You open TikTok. Desk is messy. You avoid working. Coffee finishes brewing. You sit at your tablet. When I realized most of my cues were accidental, I understood why my days felt chaotic. I wasn’t choosing my habits. My environment was.
Craving – The Feeling You Want You’re not craving TikTok. You’re craving:
Relief from stress
Escape
Entertainment
Validation
Bad habits often feel good before they feel bad.
Good habits often feel bad before they feel good.
That explains everything.
Response – The Action This is the habit itself. Draw. Scroll. Write. Avoid. The easier it is, the more likely you’ll do it. Friction decides behavior more than motivation.
Reward – The Payoff Your brain asks: “Did that feel good?” “Should I do that again?” If yes → habit strengthens. If no → habit fades. Most artists never reach this stage with good habits because they quit before any reward appears.
Making Good Habits Irresistible (The 4 Laws)
James Clear simplifies habit-building into four powerful rules.
I’ve been applying these slowly, imperfectly, and honestly.
Here’s what’s working for me:
1. Make It Obvious
Stop relying on memory.
I leave my tablet on my desk.
Sketchbook open.
Pen beside it.
If it’s hidden, it doesn’t exist.
Tip for Artists:
Design your workspace so the default action is creating.
Not setting up.
Not searching.
Not preparing.
Just starting.
2. Make It Attractive
Pair the habit with something enjoyable.
I drink my favorite coffee only while working on my IP.
Lo-fi music only plays during drawing sessions.
My brain starts associating art with comfort.
Tip:
Romanticize the process, not the outcome.
3. Make It Easy
I stopped telling myself:
“I must finish a page.”
Now I tell myself:
“I’ll draw for 10 minutes.”
"I'll jog for 30 minutes."
Most days turn into 30–60 minutes.
But even if they don’t, I still win.
Tip:
Lower the bar until failure feels silly.
4. Make It Satisfying
I track the days I show up.
Nothing fancy.
Just a check mark.
Seeing a growing chain feels good.
Breaking it feels bad.
That’s enough.
Tip:
Progress you can see becomes motivation you don’t need to summon.
WHAT CHANGED FOR ME
I’m not suddenly perfect.
I still miss days.
I still struggle.
But now:
I get more done
I feel less guilt
I balance work and family better
I show up even when I don’t feel like it
Most importantly:
I stopped fighting who I am.
I started designing systems for who I actually am.
FINAL THOUGHT
You don’t need to become a different person.
You don’t need superhuman discipline.
You need a system that makes the right choice the easy choice.
Tiny habits.
Repeated daily.
Become identity.
And identity shapes destiny.
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